Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to succeed in doing a new job, the ability to adapt oneself to the new environment is more important than the excellent knowledge of this job.
学生原文
Undoubtedly, many factors contribute to one’s professional triumph, including competent professional knowledge and an ability to acclimatize oneself to unfamiliar work settings. Indeed, it is my perspective that although professional expertise matters in completing one’s tasks, the ability to adapt oneself to a dynamic working environment matters more due to the fact that adaptability is more useful in the workplace than specialized knowledge, besides, an adaptable employee thrives on change and can work independently or collaboratively.
To begin with, adaptability matters significantly for anyone seeking and maintaining a job. In fact, with impressive professional knowledge, many job seekers easily win the approval from managers during interviews and even in the following probationary period. However, some newly recruited employees, including both fresh university graduates and those with professional experience lose their job afterwards largely due to their inadaptability to fit new working environment, or even to fit new managerial styles, which are inconsistent with those with which they used to be comfortable.
In addition, even new hires who succeed in maintaining their jobs will eventually find it hard to stand out from their peers if they fail to fit to the team culture well. Adaptability is all about the fundamental soft skills required to complete one's routinely work, including leading effective communication, handling multiple requests, making proper plans and delivering high quality works under pressure. These are skills that directly impact the impressions made on their supervisors. Employees who fail to meet their bosses' expectation on these aspects can hardly get further opportunities to show their academic strengths, and that explains why students who have achieved impressive academic performance in college barely continue their prosperity in professional work surrounding..
It is undeniable that excellent knowledge and deep insights about their areas are essential for the professionals to lead in their fields. However, technical qualities benefit people more in the long run career rather than a short term period after one's admission to a new job. In conclusion, though a good understanding of the industry matters in one's career, it is my assertion that the ability of employees to adapt themselves to new working surroundings counts more when they are fresh in their professions.
小站教育老师批改后：
Undoubtedly, many factors contribute to one’s professional triumph,including competent professional knowledge and an ability to acclimatize oneself to unfamiliar work settings. Indeed, it is my perspective that although professional expertise matters in completing one’s tasks, the ability to adapt oneself to a dynamic working environment matters more due to the fact that adaptability is more useful in the workplace than specialized knowledge, besides, an adaptable employee thrives on change and can work independently or collaboratively.
To begin with, adaptability matters significantly for anyone seeking and maintaining a job. In fact, with impressive professional knowledge, many job seekers easily win the approval from managers during interviews and even in the following probationary period. However, some newly recruited employees, including both fresh university [university可以去掉]graduates and those with professional experience lose their job afterwards largely due to their inadaptability to fit new working environment, or even to fit new managerial styles, which are inconsistent with those with which they used to be comfortable.
In addition, even new hires who succeed in maintaining their jobs will eventually find it hard to stand out from their peers if they fail to fit to the team culture well. [这一句的递进做得很好]Adaptability is all about the fundamental soft skills required to complete one's routinely work, including leading effective communication, handling multiple requests, making proper plans and delivering high quality workswork] under pressure. These are skills that directly impact the impressions made on their supervisors. Employees who fail to meet their bosses' expectation on these aspects can hardly get further opportunities to show their academic strengths, and that explains why students who have achieved impressive academic performance in college barely continue their prosperity in professional work surrounding.. [这一段的展开和上一段的衔接很不错]
It is undeniable that excellent knowledge and deep insights about their areas are essential for the professionals to lead in their fields. However, technical qualities benefit people more in the long run career rather than a short term period after one's admission to a new job. In conclusion, though a good understanding of the industry matters in one's career, it is my assertion that the ability of employees to adapt themselves to new working surroundings counts more when they are fresh in their professions.
预估分数：4.8
总体的展开很不错，内部有自然的衔接和起承转合
表达能力强，不少表达都很地道合适，继续努力哦
个别地方有语法错误，要仔细一些
