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托福写作批改:[综合][TPO22]高分作文推荐


托福写作批改前:

The reading passage presents an idea that ethanol is not a good fuel to supplant gasoline for numerous reasons. However, the professor casts doubt on this in the lecture. He points out that the argumentations in reading passage are unconvincing.

Firstly, the reading material contends that the utilization of ethanol will not solve the problem of global warming, since ethanol produces carbon dioxide, too. Nonetheless, by indicating that ethanol is made from plants, the professor argues that it will not exacerbate the global warming, since the process of growing trees for the production of ethanol counteracts the carbon dioxide released by the burning of ethanol fuel.

For the second thing, according to the reading passage, the plants available for animals will decline if people produce increasing amounts of ethanol. The professor, on the contrary, refutes this saying. He presents us the explanation, pointing out that ethanol is made from particular parts of plants, which are not eaten by animals, so sources for animals will not shrink.

At last, the reading material emphasizes that in terms of price, ethanol fuel cannot rival the gasoline. Nevertheless, this is untrue in the lecture. The professor maintains that if sufficient people are willing to exploit the ethanol, the production of ethanol will consequently increase and thus result in the drop in its price. Furthermore, if the use of ethanol is 3 times greater than that of the present, its price will astoundingly plummet by 50 per cent.

小站名师批改后:

The reading passage presents an idea that ethanol is not a good fuel to supplant gasoline for numerous reasons. However, the professor casts doubt on this in the lecture. He points out that the argumentations in reading passage are unconvincing.

Firstly, the reading material contends that the utilization of ethanol will not solve the problem of global warming, since ethanol produces carbon dioxide, too. Nonetheless, by indicating that ethanol is made from plants, the professor argues that it will not exacerbate the global warming, since [不要连接用两句一样的句式,这里用因果关系更好] the process of growing trees for the production of ethanol counteracts the carbon dioxide released by the burning of ethanol fuel.

For the second thing, according to the reading passage, the plants available for animals will decline if people produce increasing amounts of ethanol. The professor, on the contrary, refutes this saying. He presents us [人称] the explanation, pointing out that ethanol is made from particular parts of plants, which are not eaten by animals, so sources for animals will not shrink.

At last, the reading material emphasizes that in terms of price, ethanol fuel cannot rival the gasoline. Nevertheless, this is untrue in the lecture. The professor maintains that if sufficient people are willing to exploit the ethanol, the production of ethanol will consequently increase and thus result in the drop in its price. Furthermore, if the use of ethanol is 3 times greater than that of the present, its price will astoundingly plummet by 50 [40] per cent.

预估分数:4.5

数字要是不确定就不要写上去。

注意句式的变换,和句子间的逻辑关系。

Independent Task

LevelGood

4.5

28

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