Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? As modern life becomes more complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize.
学生原文：
Nowadays, as modern life becomes more complex, we find that we have many things to do. If we do not plan and organize well, our brain will be in a mess when there are lots of things to do. So, it is necessary for young people to have the ability to plan and organize.
Planning and organizing is a good approach to seperate what things are more important and what things are less important. Faced with many tasks, if we plan and organize well, we know that what we need to do first and what we do next. Then our working efficiency can be improved, work better than before, get more praise from your colleagues and managers. For example, when I was in high school, my physics is bad, but my maths is good. Without good planning, I prefer writing math assignment first, and concentrate less on my physics homework. Thus my physics remains bad, without any progress. I found that is not a good way to study, so I make a plan with much details. I always do physics assignment first. one month later I found I make a great progress on my physics, meanwhile my maths still remains good.
Moreover, planning and organizing can motivate us, prevent us from laziness, and make clear of your goal with specific details. Once we make a plan, we have to be responsible for the plan. So if you do not follow the plan, you will feel gulity, realize that it is not good for me to become lazy. Then you will continue to work, follow your plan strictly. When you find you finish all the work, you will feel proud of yourself. Although you can finish all tasks without any plan for some days, it is not so easy to persist for one year. You may abandon when you feel tired because you find your goal is unclear.
In conclusion, given the reasons and examples mentioned above, I agree with the opinion that "planning and organizing is important for young people's life".
(341 words)
Time used: 27 mins on writing, 3 mins on checking.
小站教育老师批改后：
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? As modern life becomes more complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize.
Nowadays, as modern life becomes more complex, we find that we have many things to do. If we do not plan and organize well, our brain will be in a mess when there are lots of things to do. So, it is necessary for young people to have the ability to plan and organize【乖，最好明确表述这个是自己的观点哦~而且前半部分是引题的，最好不要用来进行论证哦~论证性的内容放在后文进行表述哦~】.
Planning and organizing is a good approach to separate what【删除】things 【+ that】are more important and what【改为from the】things【+ that】are less important. Faced with many tasks, if we plan and organize well, we know that what we need to do first and what we do next. Then our working efficiency can be improved, work better than before, 【+ and】get more praise from your colleagues and managers. For example, when I was in high school, my physics is bad, but my maths is good. Without good planning, I prefer writing math assignment first, and concentrate less on my physics homework. Thus my physics remains【改为remained】bad,【不用逗号哦~】without any progress. I found that is not a good way to study, so I make a plan with much details. I always do physics assignment first. One【首字母大写哦~ month later I found I make a great progress on my physics, meanwhile my maths still remains good.
Moreover, planning and organizing can motivate us, prevent us from laziness【改为being lazy】, and make clear of your goal with specific details. Once we make a plan, we have to be responsible for the plan. So if you do not follow the plan, you will feel gulity【注意单词拼写错误哦~】, realize that it is not good for me to become lazy. Then you will continue to work, follow your plan strictly. When you find you finish【改为: have finished】 all the work, you will feel proud of yourself. Although you can finish all tasks without any plan for some days, it is not so easy to persist【+ in this habit】 for one year. You may abandon when you feel tired because you find your goal is unclear.
In conclusion, given the reasons and examples mentioned above, I agree with the opinion that "planning and organizing is important for young people's life". 【结论观点表述明确~】
(341 words)
Time used: 27 mins on writing, 3 mins on checking.
整体观点较为明确~
每个论证段的主题句不够突出哦~
每个论证段的开头句要写成既能有力论证观点又能概括本段中心大意的句子作为本段的主旨句，建议多参考一下范文的内容格式~!
两个论证段的论证内容层次感不明显，要从不同的角度进行论证哦~
独立写作范文参见: http://www.tpooo.com/xiazai/3592_2.html
