托福写作批改：关于教学的话题

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Teaching is harder than it was in the past.

学生原文：

Recently, there has been a controversial topic debated by a tremendous amount of people about whether it is more difficult to teach in the modern society. While many people might advocate that the development of teaching facilities have significantly facilitated teaching, I personally believe that teaching is actually increasingly challenging.

Above all, my main reason is that today’s students are facing more distractions that prevent them from concentrating on learning. With the rapid and prosperous of science and technology, the advance equipment not only provide us with easy access to knowledge, but it also steals our time and attention away from learning. For example, In class, students may use smart phones to chat with other friends; In the lecture hall where laptops are allowed, students may play computer games rather than take notes; At home, teenagers can be easily distracted when they work on their computers. In this sense, since students can hardly devote themselves to learning, it is evident that teaching can become increasingly difficult.

Another reason is that students are forced to deal with more challenging work. Whether in developing or developed countries, we have witnessed a booming economy, a flourishing civilization, and obviously, a harder task. In order to excel in one’s field and attain success, students have to study all sorts of difficult subjects, such as economy, sociology, physics and chemistry. Therefore, teachers have to work terribly hard, otherwise, they cannot take their responsibility to cultivate students. By comparison, several decades ago, basic knowledge is enough for students’ career and hence it was much easier for teacher to teach.

Furthermore, teachers cannot pay sufficient attention to teaching because of the terrible academic environment. Presently, teachers are forced to flatter the superiors, such as the president of the university and the government officials, otherwise they can be easily fired. However, several decades ago, teachers can still enjoy the free and tolerate academic atmosphere. The most dramatic example is that the Southwestern Associated University, had cultivated a numerous of great people in the history of China. The main reason contributes to its success is that the teachers can never be influenced by power. Although the university was established in a much more arduous situation, its teachers can enjoy teaching without being disturbed. In such aspects, it is undeniable that teaching is harder in the modern society.

In a nutshell, since students are facing more distraction and more challenging subjects and teachers are suffering from terrible atmosphere, we can justifiably draw a conclusion that teaching is much harder than it was in the past.

   小站教育老师批改后：

Recently, there has been a controversial topic debated by a tremendous amount of people about whether it is more difficult to teach in the modern society. While many people might advocate that the development of teaching facilities have significantly facilitated teaching, I personally believe that teaching is actually increasingly challenging.

Above all, my main reason is that today’s students are facing more distractions that prevent them from concentrating on learning. With the rapid and prosperous of science and technology, the advance equipment not only provide【s】 us with easy access to knowledge, but it also steals our time and attention away from learning. For example, 【i】In class, students may use smart phones to chat with other friends; In the lecture hall where laptops are allowed, students may play computer games rather than take notes; At home, teenagers can be easily distracted when they work on their computers. In this sense, since students can hardly devote themselves to learning, it is evident that teaching can become increasingly difficult. 【这段写的挺不错的，不过不知道是不是因为批过以前同样题目的文章，感觉似曾相识，后面的列举写的很不错，论证感觉比较充分】

Another reason is that students are forced to deal with more challenging work. Whether in developing or developed countries, we have witnessed a booming economy, a flourishing civilization, and obviously, a harder task. In order to excel in one’s field and attain success, students have to study all sorts of difficult subjects, such as economy, sociology, physics and chemistry. Therefore, teachers have to work terribly hard, otherwise, they cannot take their responsibility to cultivate students. By comparison, several decades ago, basic knowledge is【was】enough for students’ career【s】and hence it was much easier for teacher to teach.

Furthermore, teachers cannot pay sufficient attention to teaching because of the terrible academic environment. Presently, teachers are forced to flatter the superiors, such as the president of the university and the government officials, otherwise they can be easily fired. 【这句话有点不符合实际，并且太过绝对，可以说现在学校的老师可能更喜欢经营副业，比如说外出讲学，做课外老师】 However, several decades ago, teachers can still enjoy the free and tolerate academic atmosphere. The most dramatic example is that the Southwestern Associated University, 【which】had【has】 cultivated a numerous of great people in the history of China. The main reason contributes to its success is that the teachers can never be influenced by power【outside forces】. Although the university was established in a much more arduous situation, its teachers can【could】enjoy teaching without being disturbed. In such aspects, it is undeniable that teaching is harder in the modern society.

In a nutshell, since students are facing more distraction and more challenging subjects and teachers are suffering from terrible atmosphere, we can justifiably draw a conclusion that teaching is much harder than it was in the past.

预估分数：

25

写的很不错，语言方面也显得很出众，但是多多注意细节语法错误，不要再犯了哦，第三段的论点有空泛，但是前面写的很不错。继续加油吧。