Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?
学生原文：
Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concern about their living conditions. Some people state that living in a house is comfortable, others believe that living in an apartment is convenient. In my point of view, I agree with the idea that living in a house is a nice thing in life. As the following reasons.
On the one hand, there is a large space of a house. Children can play in the front countyard to the top of one’s bent, and the elderly can grow flowers and plants in the backyard to kill their retired time. While the main goal of most young people is that they can enable their family members to lead a good life, so living in a house can improve the happiness of youth also.
On the other hand, living in an independent space can protect privcy. This is because that a house is far away from others. For example, most celebrities have choosen the house to live in. it is not only they can afford the house, but also they do not want their life to be disturbed.
It is not to say that apartments will on longer be demanded. Of course, an apartment is suitable for the family which has only one or two persons . For example, a new couple who have not a baby yet donot need a large space. But this period of time is temporary and most citizens will have a whole family which includes children and aged.
In summary, holding a big house is a dream of most people. Especially when the city center is more and more crowed, buying a house will become a trend in the future.
小站教育老师批改后：
Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concern about their living conditions. 【背景介绍】Some people state that living in a house is comfortable, others believe that living in an apartment is convenient.【改写题目】【直接用advantage比较好，因为方便和舒适只是一个方面】 In my point of view, I agree with the idea that living in a house is a nice thing in life. 【自己的观点】As the following reasons.【这句话不要】
第一段按照背景介绍——改写题目——自己的观点 来写很好，结构鲜明，内容充实。
On the one hand, there is a large space of a house. Children can play in the front countyard to the top of one’s bent, and the elderly can grow flowers and plants in the backyard to kill their retired time. While the main goal of most young people is that they can enable their family members to lead a good life, so living in a house can improve the happiness of youth also.
On the other hand, living in an independent space can protect privcy. This is because that a house is far away from others. For example, most celebrities have choosen the house to live in. it is(the reason for which is that) not only they can afford the house, but also they do not want their life to be disturbed.【中心句放在第一句很好，比较清晰，考官容易理解，自己也不容易写走题】
It is not to say that apartments will on (no)longer be demanded. Of course, an apartment is suitable for the family which has only one or two persons . For example, a new couple who have not a baby yet donot need a large space. But this period of time is temporary and most citizens will have a whole family which includes children and aged. 【这一段可以讲主单独房子的不足：花费大，这也是住合租公寓的优点。题目是需要分析住单独房子的优缺点的】
In summary, holding a big house is a dream of most people. Especially when the city center is more and more crowed,(crowded) buying a house will become a trend in the future.
估分：6.5-7
评价：论证结构合理，论证充分。但是对于题目问题的回答不够完全充分。
