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作文批改前:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

When teachers assign projects on which students must work together, the students learn much more effectively than when they are asked to work alone on projects.

Students in campus are always required to complete various types of assignments, among which I regard the group project as the most beneficial one. It's commonly believed that working together on a group project help improve students learning efficiency than working alone. I couldn't agree more with this belief and I will explore some of the most essential aspects of the benefits as follows.

First and foremost, students working together on a group project can always have brainstorms, thus speeds up the process of problem solving. This advantage is mostly obvious when you encounter a problem. As is known to all that different people have different minds, and they hold various perspectives over a specific problem. Therefore, people in the group are more likely to spot the points that are oversighted by others, which greatly improve the problem solving efficiency.

On the other hand, students getting together on a project can learn from each other, which can help expand their sight of view. This benefit is easy to understand since different people specializing in different field, and the knowledge of that field can compensate for the others' lacking of that kind of knowledge. A simple example will suffice to illustrate my viewpoint. I'm fortunate to have a double bachelor in accounting. And in this class, students are coming from different original major, ranging from environmental science to electronic engineering. During some of the courses, we are instructed to form several groups to do a large project. At one time, we were required to build up a virtual company specializing in environment improvement and came out with a rough plan, as well as a financial arrangement to prove its feasibility. At this project, we had some group members to select the most critical environmental problem and analyse it. While members from electronic engeering could provide the technology support and design a device to tackle the problem. I myself was from the faculty of life of science, and I took charge of monitering the possible effect that might pose on the local species. Our project went on successfully, with everyone could make themselves useful. And during this process, we were fortuante to have to chance to have a quick look at other fields, which really brodened our knowledge scope.

Last but not least, working in the group can help students to develop various skills based on their roles. As we know, a groud can be composed of group leader and group member. And students belonged to different group can practice different skills. Take the leader for instance, a group leader is supposed to be decisive and be able to oversight the whole project, while at the same time to deligate assignments to members. Being a leader is undoubtedly tough but it would really cultivate ones's potential to become a real leader. On the other hand, being a member should learn to follow the instruction from the leader, learn to obey while at the some time vocal different ideas if you find another way to solve the problem. This experience can also practice students communitive skills, learning ablility, too.

In conclusion, it is much more beneficial to work together on a group project than work alone.

小站名师批改后:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

When teachers assign projects on which students must work together, the students learn much more effectively than when they are asked to work alone on projects.

Students in campus are always required to complete various types of assignments, among which I regard the group project as the most beneficial one. It's commonly believed that working together on a group project help[helps] improve students learning efficiency than working alone. I couldn't agree more with this belief and I will explore some of the most essential aspects of the benefits as follows.

First and foremost, students working together on a group project can always have brainstorms, thus[which] speeds up the process of problem solving. This advantage is mostly obvious when you encounter a problem. As is known to all that different people have different minds, and they hold various perspectives over a specific problem. Therefore, people in the group are more likely to spot the points that are oversighted by others, which greatly improve the problem solving efficiency.

On the other hand, students getting together on a project can learn from each other, which can help expand their sight of view. This benefit is easy to understand since different people specializing[specialize] in different field[fields], and the knowledge of that field can compensate for the others' lacking of that kind of knowledge. A simple example will suffice to illustrate my viewpoint. I'm fortunate to have a double bachelor in accounting. And in this class, students are coming from different original major[majors], ranging from environmental science to electronic engineering. During some of the courses, we are instructed to form several groups to do a large project. At one time, we were required to build up a virtual company specializing in environment improvement and came out with a rough plan, as well as a financial arrangement to prove its feasibility. At this project, we had some group members to select the most critical environmental problem and analyse it. While members from electronic engeering could provide the technology support and design a device to tackle the problem. I myself was from the faculty of life of science, and I took charge ofmonitering[monitoring] the possible effect[effects] that might pose on the local species. Our project went on successfully, with everyone could make[making] themselves useful . And during this process, we were fortuante to have to[the] chance to have a quick look at other fields, which really brodened[broadened] our knowledge scope.[细节叙述可以简化些,有些啰嗦]

Last but not least, working in the group can help students to develop various skills based on their roles. As we know, a groud can be composed of group leader and group member. And students belonged[belonging] to different group[groups] can practice different skills. Take the leader for instance, a group leader is supposed to be decisive and be able to oversight the whole project, while at the same time to deligate[assign] assignments to members. Being a leader is undoubtedly tough but it would really cultivate ones's potential to become a real leader. On the other hand, being a member should learn to follow the instruction from the leader, learn to obey while at the some[same] time vocal different ideas if you find another way to solve the problem. This experience can also practice students[allow students to practice] communitive skills, learning ablility, too.

In conclusion, it is much more beneficial to work together on a group project than work alone.[可以再完善一下]

观点展开很好,各个部分之间也有自然的过度和衔接;论点和论据逻辑紧密,说服力强,表述较通顺流畅,但注意一些细节如拼写错误、动词和名词形式,写好后检查下会更好。


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