托福写作批改：[综合+独立][TPO32]高分作文推荐

作文批改前：

Question: Summarise the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage.

The reading passage asserts that there are several possible theories can account for the \'quackers\' that found by Russian. The professor refutes the passage, by stating that none of them is right. She mentions three major points.
First, the professor says that orca whales live on the surface of the sea, but the submarine worked deep in the sea. It is unlikely for the submarine to hear the noise that made by orca whales. What\'s more, the whales can be detected by sonar. This completely contradicts the point in the reading passage that the strange sounds were the calls of orca whales.
Second, in the lecture, she claims that giant squids are animals that they will continue to live in the place where they are before, they wouldn\'t disappear suddenly. The sounds were heard only between 1960 and 1980, so the sounds couldn\'t be caused by giant squid. This position is the opposite of the reading passage.

Finally, the professor doesn\'t agree with the reading passage that frog sounds were made by some foreign submarines which were using a special technology to make them undetectable by sonar. She says that our human haven\'t have such an advanced submarine that can change direction as quickly as strange noises are. What\'s more, we still couldn\'t make the engine silent enough to eliminate vibration.

Question:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Those people who enjoy unexpected things and can adapt themselves quickly in many situations might say that they feel very satisfied with the world they live in. However, in my opinion, people lead a more difficult life and they feel less happy then the previous people. This phenomenon can attribute to the intricate relationship between individuals and the heavy workload.
First, the sophisticated relationship among human is really a big problem to us. In the past, people could be divided into two categories: the good ones and the bad ones. But now, friends can become enemies, and your opponents may change to your co-workers last second. In order to survive in this dog-eat-dog society, people have to live cautious enough to not infringe upon others\' benefit. You might say that you can live very well without other\'s help so you don\'t need to care about others\' feeling. However, can you say that you can have a good job and keep have it even if you have a quarrel with your boss? Can you say that you can have a very pleasant life without having a friend? Absolutely not. As you can see, if you want to live better in the modern society, you need to handle these interpersonal relationships very carefully.
Moreover, when it comes to study, today\'s people are suffering a lot than before. As the society is getting more complex, there is no denying the fact that we have to learn more knowledge and work more hard in order to keep pace with the world. For example, students in my university should learn many different subjects-math, Chinese, philosophy, English, statistics, even though their major are accounting, finance or economics. Through this way, they may more easy to get to a favorite position in the intense competition and have a better performance in their future careers. The more advanced our society will be, the more knowledge we need to learn. It is really a hard time for our students to survive in this fast-changing world.

In summary, with the development of our society, with the advancement of the technology, our modern people are more easily to feel stressed out due to the heavy burden of having to have a good relationship with the people around us and having to study hard.

小站写作老师批改后：

Question: Summarise the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage.

The reading passage asserts that there are several possible theories 【+that】can account for the 'quackers' that found by Russian. The professor refutes the passage, by stating that none of them is right. She mentions three major points.

First, the professor says that orca whales live on the surface of the sea, but the submarine worked deep in the sea. It is unlikely for the submarine to hear the noise that made by orca whales. What's more, the whales can be detected by sonar. This completely contradicts the point in the reading passage that the strange sounds were the calls of orca whales.

Second, in the lecture, she claims that giant squids are animals that they will continue to live in the place where they are【were】 before, they wouldn't disappear suddenly. The sounds were heard only between 1960 and 1980, so the sounds couldn't be caused by giant squid. This position is the opposite of the reading passage.

Finally, the professor doesn't agree with the reading passage that frog sounds were made by some foreign submarines which were using a special technology to make them undetectable by sonar. She says that our human haven't have【had】 such an advanced submarine that can change direction as quickly as strange noises are【can】. What's more, we still couldn't make the engine silent enough to eliminate vibration.

对两篇文章内容的概述准确、全面;结构连贯、语句流畅

分数：5.0

Level: GOOD (4.0–5.0)

ADVICE FOR IMPROVEMENT OF INTERGRATED TASK

>> Continue to improve your ability to relate and convey information from two or more sources. For example, practice analyzing reading passages in English.

>> Read two articles or chapters on the same topic or issue, write a summary of each, and then explain the ways they are similar and the ways they are different.

>> Practice combining listening and reading by searching for readings related to talks and lectures with teacher or a friend.

Question:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Those people who enjoy unexpected things and can adapt themselves quickly in【to】 many situations might say that they feel very satisfied with the world they live in. However, in my opinion, people lead a more difficult life and they feel less happy then【than】 the previous people. This phenomenon can attribute to the intricate relationship between individuals and the heavy workload.

First, the sophisticated relationship among human is really a big problem to us. In the past, people could be divided into two categories: the good ones and the bad ones. But now, friends can become enemies, and your opponents may change to your co-workers last second. In order to survive in this dog-eat-dog society, people have to live cautious【cautiously】 enough to not【not to】 infringe upon others' benefit. You might say that you can live very well without other's help so you don't need to care about others' feeling. However, can you say that you can have a good job and keep have【having】 it even if you have a quarrel with your boss? Can you say that you can have a very pleasant life without having a friend? Absolutely not. As you can see, if you want to live better in the modern society, you need to handle these interpersonal relationships very carefully.

Moreover, when it comes to study, today's people are suffering a lot than before. As the society is getting more complex, there is no denying the fact that we have to learn more knowledge and work more hard【harder】 in order to keep pace with the world. For example, students in my university should learn many different subjects-math, Chinese, philosophy, English, statistics, even though their major are accounting, finance or economics. Through this way, they may more easy【it may be easier for them】 to get to a favorite position in the intense competition and have a better performance in their future careers. The more advanced our society will be, the more knowledge we need to learn. It is really a hard time for our students to survive in this fast-changing world.

In summary, with the development of our society, with the advancement of the technology, our modern people are more easily to feel stressed out due to the heavy burden of having to have【establish,前面是having，所以换个词】 a good relationship with the people around us and having to study hard.

1. 作者立场明确，用充足的篇幅进行论证，内容完整、切题

2. 论证段落的条理很清晰，逻辑严密

3. 能使用正确的语法和词汇表达自己的观点

分数：5.0